I am new to this, like really new. But time flows by and there is no 'some day'. So here I am. I need to hijack a spice cargo and get some of that into my life. My good wife is not into this swing thing but is ok that I am.

Would be keen on a clandestine meeting by the river in dappled light with a gorgeous gregarious blonde.. or maybe something more modest. Could even be curious to meet a nice couple and throw a handful of spices on the fire. Hell I'll even throw in some poetry.

Can someone help me out here?